Hoverflies at the Commonwealth Games

What events would hoverflies compete best in at the Commonwealth games , given their agility, ability to hover, turn sharply & precision flight.

Now for something completely different.....

We often anthropomorphise the creatures we encounter, giving them names and personalities. It allows us, as humans, to feel more connected to wildlife. As a child, I would often be glued to the TV watching Johnny Morris on Animal Magic. His voiceovers regularly made me laugh out loud.

Well, this week’s offering isn’t from a zoo, nor is it a voiceover about the strange behaviours of its inhabitants. Instead, it’s a bit of fun.

For the next 11 days, the Commonwealth Games will be on our screens, showcasing a wide range of sporting events we rarely get to see nowadays. So, join me as I jump, swim, and run into a bit of fantasy—exploring which events our hoverflies, these little superhero pollinators, might take part in.

While hoverflies (Syrphidae) are not Olympic athletes, their specialised and agile flight—including hovering, backward flight, and rapid darting—makes them uniquely suited to mimic the mechanics of certain Commonwealth disciplines.

This is all a bit of fun, but also a great way for me to highlight the traits of some of our most common hoverflies and how they might earn their place on the team.

You may well have your own suggestions—and that’s absolutely fine. Everyone has good reasons for their team selections, and it’s easy to argue that the best hoverflies were left at home, especially when results don’t go our way. But I’ve done my best!

Athletics

I’m going to start with athletics, especially the short sprints—which the younger me loved competing in.

So, the hoverfly I’ve chosen for the 100m and 200m is the Narcissus Bulb Hoverfly (Merodon equestris), built for strong, fast bursts over short distances.

For the middle distances, I’m going with the Common Tiger Hoverfly (Helophilus pendulus), also known as the Footballer —sadly not an event at this Commonwealth Games. Training has therefore been slightly different, especially after being knocked out of the World Cup.

For the long distances, I’m selecting the Marmalade Hoverfly (Episyrphus balteatus). These incredible migrants make the journey across the Alps every year, so that’s a definite tick in the altitude-training box. When they leave the UK in autumn, they head all the way back to the continent in one continuous journey—truly amazing.

Swimming

For the swimming events, I’ve chosen the Common Dronefly (Eristalis tenax), known for its aquatic larval stage—often called “long-tailed maggots”—which live and breathe through a tail-like siphon.

This makes them perfect for underwater performance. Their compact, streamlined body shape, with smooth contours, should reduce drag in the pool. Only time will tell whether we’re looking at an Adam Peaty or a Rebecca Adlington!

Cycling

For our cycling events, we’re looking for competitors with outstanding hovering skills, explosive acceleration, impressive endurance, and keen spatial awareness—qualities essential for success in fast-paced velodrome races.

The standout choice is the Compost Hoverfly (Syritta pipens). Renowned for its distinctive thickened hind legs, this hoverfly has the power, stability, and athletic build to excel on the track, making it a strong contender for any cycling discipline.

Gymnastics

This is the largest team we’re sending to the Games—so a big thank you to the National Lottery for the funding!

As a team sport, we need a range of abilities: grace, balance, agility, and precision.

•The Bumblebee Plumehorn (Volucella bombylans) earns its place with tight hovering manoeuvres, sudden flips, and the ability to hold perfectly stable mid-air positions. It will be contesting the vault and rings.

•The Long Globetail Hoverfly (Sphaerophoria scripta), with its needle-thin body, is ideal for balance beam aesthetics.

•I’ve seen the Chequered Hoverfly (Melanostoma scalare) “orbit” flowers in a smooth, controlled circular rhythm—perfect for the pommel horse.

•Meanwhile, the Elegant Hoverfly (Baccha elongata), with its delicate, agile movement and graceful shifts in position, is a natural fit for the floor routines.

Weightlifting

Only one competitor was selected for this event, but not before a dramatic lift-off between the Batman Hoverfly (Myathropa florea) and the Great Pied Plumehorn (Volucella pellucens).

After much deliberation, the committee chose Batman as the official representative—thanks to its broad thorax, thick, powerful legs… and, let’s be honest, the cooler name. I’m sure Robin will be somewhere in the crowd, cheering him on.

But fear not—the Great Pied Hoverfly hasn’t been left out entirely. It will step up to represent the team in the shot put and discus. However, it faces a tough challenge from the Dark-edged Bee-fly (Bombylius major), although not a hoverfly, a firm favourite to take the title once again. This is because in the wild the Dark-edged Bee-fly is known to spin and flick its eggs into a bee’s nest - perfect training for this kind of sport.

And there you have it—your hoverfly superhero team.

What other commonwealth events could hoverflies take part in?

Which species would you select, and for which events?

Good luck to all the competitors! May the values of Humanity, Equality, and Destiny be upheld—celebrating connection, fairness, and shared purpose among all athletes, no matter which nation of the Commonwealth you represent. I’ll be cheering you all on.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this slightly odd dive into the world of competitive hoverfly sport. If you did, please consider a small donation—perhaps buy me a coffee. And if you think I’m bonkers… you’re absolutely right—but no need to tell me. It’s all just a bit of fun.

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